For the last couple of days, I've been trying to come up with an apt simile for keeping one hand on my wild little man while simultaneously trying to chitchat with grown people. However, since Monday's post I feel like I've exhausted badgers, and wolverines are too similar. So maybe this - it's like trying to pour someone a cup of tea in a tornado. You want to be polite and friendly, but really you're just gonna be all over the place and have to pray they'll forgive you.
I've also been trying to mentally compose a list of places I have had to sit down on the floor and try to soothe the savage Buddy. The easy ones are stores and restaurants - too often to name. Public bathrooms? Of course. Church? The kids loves a stage, and makes an appearance on the stand about once a month, so I crawl under the piano to retrieve him. Airports? Please. Site of one of the most memorable moments, when flying alone with Buddy and trying to get through security - it took me and two angelic businessmen to get him, his car seat, two suitcases, and my sanity safely (barely) onto the plane. Yesterday, it was the museum - a favorite place, but not one he leaves easily. So we spent 5-7 minutes on the floor in front of the elevator, Ash pretending to sleep, me holding onto one of his ankles so he couldn't make a break for it. (Does the kid have to be built like a linebacker?) I ended up carrying all 53 wiggling squiggling pounds of him out of the building while he wailed "New-se-yum! No home! No car!" He also has a bizarre aversion to zoos - but that's pretty much its own post altogether.
We don't have an official diagnosis for Ash - I'm sure we could get the whole alphabet soup (ADHD, ASD, SPD, etc etc) and I'm cool with that, but we haven't needed anything official so far. But I do tend to use shorthand for strangers - nothing makes judgmental people on an airplane stop giving you stinkeye like saying 'He's autistic." All of a sudden what they see as bad parenting magically transforms into personal sainthood - it's a bit delicious, I'm not gonna lie. But it's too simple an explanation, and while I like avoiding judgement, I also dread people dismissing my kid's brilliant, unique, creative, fascinating mind. So I get a near-daily exercise in letting go of the judgements of others, and embracing the messy here and now. Let's just pretend that all public floors just got mopped this morning - that usually helps.
"A bit delicious!" Fabulous phrase
ReplyDelete"it's like trying to pour someone a cup of tea in a tornado" Perfection! I have actually stared someone down and asked if they'd like to try. The looks get worse when they are 7-8, but there is hope. With all I went through with D, no one can tell now and he only has minor issues every so often (unless trying to decide what meal to order at a restaurant😞). It's a good thing too; he's just a hair shy of 6' and not done growing. No worries about what others think, all you need to know is that you are doing a great job.
ReplyDeleteLook at you instilling in children a love of refinement and cultural appreciation. Having a meltdown upon leaving is way more impressive than before you enter.
ReplyDeleteSounds like you've got your hands full!! Who cares what others think!! I know what ya mean though... Just remember you're the bomb.com mom!!
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